Mykitchencam: March 2012

Friday, March 23, 2012

Double meaning sms :School mein 1

Double meaning sms :School mein 1 FAIL student k papa class teacher se:

Madam,thoda aap tight karo,thoda main zor lagata hoon,bhagwan ne chaha to iss saal bachcha nikal hi jayega.

Jai mata di Maa ki jyoti se noor milta

Jai mata di Maa ki jyoti se noor milta hai,sabke dilon ko sarur milta hai,jo bhi jata hai MAA ke dwar kuch na kuch jarur milta hai
"SHUBH NAVRATRE"

Maa ki jyoti se prem milta hai,Sabke

Maa ki jyoti se prem milta hai,Sabke dilo ko marm milta hai,Jo bhi jata hai MAA ke dwar kuch na kuch jarur milta hai.SHUBH NAVRATRI.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

I am sorry sms For every minute you are

I am sorry sms For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness. I am so sorry!

Love SMS Do u know, what I say, what I think, what

Love Do u know, what I say, what I think, what I feel, what I think, what I wish, U want to know? I MISS U SO MUCH.

Love SMS Without your love my days are: sadday

Without your love my days are: sadday, moanday, tearsday, wasteday, thirstday, frightday, shatterday.

Husband wife SMS Nayi shaadi aur purani shaadi mein kya fark hota hai

Husband wife sms Nayi shaadi aur purani shaadi mein kya fark hota hai?
Nayi shaadi mein dono "LIPS" mila kar sote hain
aur purani shaadi mein dono "HIPS" mila kar sote hai

Reply SMS :navratra special 23-03-2012 se maa ke navrate start h..

Reply SMS :navratra special 23-03-2012 se maa ke navrate start h..
Delete mt krna.. Aapko Mata ki kasam.. 9 logo ko bhejo.. Fast.. (except me) Raat tak.. Aapke pass Achchi khabar aayegi.

NaughtyJoke: Ek aurat: Jab tumhara talak hua tha, tab to tumhara ek hi

NaughtyJoke: Ek aurat: Jab tumhara talak hua tha, tab to tumhara ek hi bachcha tha. Ab 3 kaise? Aurat: Woh kabhi kabhi maafi mangne aa jate the.

Naughty sms Boy- Dadaji, Kya Pad Rhe Ho? Dada- Itihas Ki Kitaab. Boy-

Naughty sms Boy- Dadaji, Kya Pad Rhe Ho? Dada- Itihas Ki Kitaab. Boy- Par Ye To Sex Ki Kitab Lagti Hai. Dada- Are beta, Mere Liye To Ye Itihas Hi Hai Na.

Naughty sms Bikni is the only dress in which 90% body is exposed ...

lekin fir b ladko ki najar sali sirf 10% covered jagah par hi jati hain ..
LADKE Kitne shareef hote h

Naughty sms Angrez Pakistan ayaa

Naughty sms Angrez Pakistan ayaa..

Taxi lee..

Raastay mein driver ne uska sub kuch loot liya

Uskay kapde bhi utaar ke usse veeranay mein phenk diya

Ek Pathan udhar se guzra to Angrez ne usko awaaz di.
Pathan: 'Oho yeh ki hoa laale di jaan?'

Angrez ne saari baat rotey rotey batai..

Pathan apna naada kholte huye bola: 'Yaara tera aaj din hi kharab hai..'

Monday, March 19, 2012

>>"Nasha"<< 'Mohabbat' Ka Ho Ya

>>"Nasha"<<
'Mohabbat'
Ka Ho Ya
'Sharab' Ka.
Hosh Dono Mein Kho Jate Hain.
Fark Sirf Itna H Ki Sharab Sula Deti H.
Or
Mohabbat Rula Deti Hai.

Teacher : Jis aadmi k dono hath na ho usse hindi aur english me kya

Teacher : Jis aadmi k dono hath na ho usse hindi aur english me kya kahenge?.. ..

Sardar: hindi me THAKUR aur english me HANDS FREE.:)

Fantastic lines of Mother Terresa

Fantastic lines of Mother Terresa:
"If your eyes are positive..
You will like
the world.."
"If ur tongue
is positive..
The world will like you..!"
Gn8..! :)

Kingfisher Air hostess: Sir kya lenge? Pandit: Puri-Sabzi, Halwa, Kheer

Kingfisher Air hostess: Sir kya lenge?
Pandit: Puri-Sabzi, Halwa, Kheer, Laddu & Dal Bhat..
Air hostess: Sir Aap Plane Me Aaye Hai.

Kingfisher Ke "Shraadh" Me Nahi...!!!

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Teacher to SCIENCE student

Teacher to SCIENCEstudent-
NAADE ko english me kya kehte hain?

Student-
P.H.D.

Teacher-
kya matlab?

Student-
Pjama holding device.

Saturday, March 17, 2012

No matter how many times teeth

No matter how many times teeth bits the tongue, they still stay together in one mouth. That's the spirit of FORGIVENESS.

During my school days,my teachers alwys

During my school days,my teachers alwys usd to wear sun glasses.
Do u knw y?

cos
I was such a Bright student.!!

no claps plz..
hey No No..pls pls;)

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Dr.-Aapki Biwi Ab Sirf 2 Dino

Dr.-Aapki Biwi Ab Sirf 2 Dino Ki Mehman Hai, I Am So Sorry!
Santa- Sorry Ki Koi Baat Nahi Hai Dr. Saab, Jab 20 Saal Nikal Gaye to 2 Din Bhi Nikal Hi Jayenge..!

The Disturbing Parents

The Disturbing Parents!

When we are in school-
Beta yahi waqt hai bahut mehnat karo taqi acche college me jaa sako. Ayaashi ke lie to sari umar padi !

When we Are in College-
Beta college me bs pdhai pe dhyan de taqi acchi job mil sake ! Ayaashi to jab job krega tab maze se krio !

When we are doing job-
Jyada ayaashi mt kro future me apne biwi bacho ke liye save krke rakho !

Do uh think we are mad ?? :(

Funny Cadbury ad Boy-cn i hav a bite of ur dairy milk? Grl

Boy-cn i hav a bite of ur dairy milk?
Grl- kya mein aapko jaanti hu?
Boy-jaldi de de behen.. momos khaake aaya hun mirchi lagi hai drame baad me kr liyo..:p:D

GIRLS STUPIDITY

GIRLS STUPIDITY:-

They wont give their phone no. even to a KNOWN PERSON.

But they give all their PRIVATE details to an UNKNOWN TAILOR. :p

Time for a Heart Touching Poem- Gaur se Sune

Time for a Heart Touching Poem-
Gaur se Sune,

Kavita Ka Naam Hai,

"DO BOOND"

Suniye

"Tupuk...Tupuk.."

Thanks..!:D

Defintion of Arrange Marriage

Super_FUN
Defintion of Arrange Marriage-

BIKA HUA MAAL VAPIS NAHI HOGA...

Defintion of Love Marriage

PEHLE ISTEMAL KARE, PHIR VISHWAS KARE.

Ek Saadhu bijli theek kar raha tha, achanak use current laga

Ek Saadhu bijli theek kar raha tha, achanak use current laga...

Saadhu: har har gange, har har gange.

Budiya: Aur le le pange..

aur le le pange.. :p

'Teacher 2 Santa: Jis Aadmi ko Sunai na de Use English me kya kahenge

'Teacher 2 Santa: Jis Aadmi ko Sunai na de Use English me kya kahenge ?

Santa: Jo Marzi keh do..
Usko kaunsa kuch Sunai dega...!

What is similarity between SUN & WIFE

What is similarity between
SUN & WIFE..?
?
?
?
?
?
Very Simple..
?
?
?
?

You can not look into the eyes of both

Woman buys new Sim card

Woman buys new Sim card.
To surprise husband, She goes to the Kitchen, & calls "HI DARLING;)"pahchana?
He says "will call U later dear.The Bitch Is in kitchen"

Reply SMS 1. Wts cute in me

1. Wts cute in me=
2. Wts dangerous in me=
3. Wts my name in ur cell=
4. I m ur=
5. I look like=
6. Wt do you wish 4 me=
7. U hate me when= .... REPLY

Police:- "Humey pakki Khabar mili hai

Police:- "Humey pakki Khabar mili hai ki aapke Ghar mein visphotak samagri hai..!!"

Santa~ "Sir khabar to ekdum pakki hai par Wo abhi Maikey gayi hui hai.

Ek sharabi ki daastaan

Ek sharabi ki daastaan..

Soch raha hoon ki daaru chhod du..!

Par...

.
Kiske paas chhodu.!
sabhi kamine hain,
pee jayege;-

Aaj thoda senti wala

Aaj thoda senti wala..!!

SuKHe "PaTToN" Ki
TaRaH "BiKHRe" The "HuM..."

***YaaRo***
************

Kisi Ne "SaMeTa" "Bhi To
SiRF""JaLaaNe" "Ke" "LiYe.

1 writer ne likha, ki pati ko B ghar k mamlo me bolne ka hakk hona chahiye.

('.')
</"/>
_/"\_

Wo bechara bhi likh hi paya,
bol nhi saka.....
$$$

1 aurat Subah hote hi mohalle ke

1 aurat Subah hote hi mohalle ke HAKIM k pas gyi aur boli- Kya mere PATI ko SHAKTI VARDHAK dawa apne di thi
Hakim:Ji ha
LADY: To Kamine BIWI bhi apni de deta :p

Ek kamina baccha Bus driver k piche

Ek kamina baccha Bus driver k piche zor zor se kah raha tha
agrmera bap hathi or ma hathni hoti to me chota hathi hota
agr mera bap bakra or ma bakri hoti to me chota memna hota
Itne me bus driver gusse me bache se agar tera bap bhadwa or ma randi hoti to tu kya hota

baccha bola-to mai bus driver hota. . .

SANTA: Shimla ja rha hu, Raste me

SANTA: Shimla ja rha hu, Raste me BIWI ko khayi me gira dunga.
BANTA: Meri BHI leja, use bhi gira dena.
SANTA: Agr tu BURA na mane, to use VAPSI me gira du.

Sardar ki amma mar gyi.

Sardar ki amma mar gyi.
1 aadmi bola-amma mjhe bhi le jati.
2-4 aur bole-amma hame bhi le jati
Sardar bola-chup ho jao gadho. amma kya tata sumo karke gai h.

At 6 am, SARDAR- was running only in underwear.

At 6 am,
SARDAR- was running only in underwear.
Someone asked him: Bahut Garmi hai na?
SARDAR: Garmi kaye ki,
Baajuwala Duty se Jaldi aa gaya..:))

Santa to teacher-Mam, jab Hindustan

Santa to teacher-Mam, jab Hindustan ko Hind,
Pakistan ko Pak,
Australia ko Aus
kahte h to
Brazil aur London ko kya kahege?
Teacher- Tu apna kam kar,kamine...

Har kamyab Aadmi k piche 1 Aurat hoti

Har kamyab Aadmi k piche 1 Aurat hoti hai, jo use itna tang karti hai ki wo dukhi hokr apne kam me itna busy ho jata he k kamyabi khud uske kadam chumti ha

HEER - Main Tumhare Ishq Me

HEER - Main Tumhare Ishq Me Barbaad Ho Gayi, Lut Gyi, Ruswa Ho Gayi...

Raanjha - To karmjali Mai Kaun Sa I.A.S. OFFICER Ban Gaya.....!!!

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Naughty SMS Train Reservation Form pe 1 Ladke ne Sex k aage likha_ 3 times daily.

Train Reservation Form pe 1 Ladke ne Sex k aage likha_
3 times daily.

Lady clerk-
7 din tak koi seat khali nhi he, tab tak tum chaho to mere ghar reh skte ho..

Friday, March 9, 2012

funny steve jobs

Freshers World	Online radio	Send Sms and quote	Contact US
Spicy food video	FLP Products	SBI insurance products	About Us!

funny steve jobs

Freshers World	Online radio	Send Sms and quote	Contact US
Spicy food video	FLP Products	SBI insurance products	About Us!

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Loyalty test- wife buys a dozen underwear

Loyalty test- wife buys a dozen underwear of same color for husband. Husband-y same color, ppl wil think I nvr change underwear. Wife-which ppl? total silence

Height of Crazy Friends

Height of Crazy Friends
.
.
.
A boy enjoying a date wid his gf, suddenly his frnd cums nd luks at his gf nd says:
"Bhai,kal wali jyada achhi thi";):D

Funny SMS on zero DANDRUFF ad

Madam to student: u scored zero.

Student proudly moves his hand through his hairs...

Madam: idiot! U scored zero marks, not zero DANDRUFF.

Reply SMS I m expert in ___________ ??

I m expert in ___________ ??

1. FashiOn/style
2. LOve
3. Flirt
4. Giving respect
5.talking
6. Studying
7. Caring
8. Friendship..
Reply must.
Cn ripli wi

Dr: Jab aapko pata tha chipkali aapke

Dr: Jab aapko pata tha chipkali aapke naak mein ja rahi hai toh aapne roka kyun nahi :/? Patient: pehle cockroch gya tha maine socha use pakdne ja rahi hogi

Sardar plane land hote hi chillane laga

Sardar plane land hote hi chillane laga
"Banglore aya banglore aya.Balle Balle"
Air hostess:hello sir..B silent
Sardr"Ok, anglore aya anglore aya alle alle"..:p

Iss saal ka sabse zalil SMS

Iss saal ka sabse zalil SMS=

Ladka: Jaanu mai tumhe subah se sham aur sham se subah tak pyar karunga..!
Ladki: Jaanu to fir mai tatti kab karungi?

Sardar was Reading Financial Times Headlines

Sardar was Reading Financial Times
Headlines
"Microsoft Buys Yahoo Messenger 4 $8.5 billion.."

He says
"O Teri:O, Khareeda Kyun:/, Download Kar Leta pagla."

Punjabi SMS Kisi ka accident dekhne pr expressions

Kisi ka accident dekhne pr expressions- U.S-OH my god PAK-ya allah Africa-o la la Australia-got a hit... punjabi-oo vajeya bhen da yaar...hor chala tez

Naughty SMS Biwi raatko kpde utarte hue,tirchhi

Biwi raatko kpde utarte hue,tirchhi nazar se Santa ki taraf dekhte hue boli-"Pata h na ,kya krna h?"
Santa:Dimag ka dhai mat kr, m raat ko kapde ni dhounga..:p

Naughty SMS Male v/s Female Brain.

Male v/s Female Brain.
Female BRAIN Thinking
20% Jewelry
20% Shoping
20% Money
20% Enjoy
10% Fuck
10% Kitchen care.

Male Brain

99% Fuck
&
1% how 2 FUCK.

Degi MIRCH KA TADKA, ANG-ANG Fadka..

SEX TIP.. Jab bhi aap Condom ka prayog kare to usme 1 spoon Degi mirch daal le.
Ye aapko aur zyada uttejit karega. 'Q ki Degi MIRCH KA TADKA, ANG-ANG Fadka..

Naughty SMS Father Watchng FTV Sudenly Son Came

Father Watchng FTV
Sudenly Son Came

Fathr diplomaticaly said-Garib Ladkiya Hai, Kpde Lene K Liye B Paise Nai Hai
Son:Iss se B Garib chahiye to CD hai mere pas.

Patni: tumhe patta hai swarg me patti aur

Patni: tumhe patta hai swarg me patti aur patni ko satth nahi rehne dete.
Patti: pagli tabhi to usse swarg kehte hai.

'Maa' kya hoti hai?

'Maa' kya hoti h?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
papa ki sbse aakhri wali setting..
Har bar emotional hone ki jarurat nhi Hai..;):)