Husband wife sms: 1 aurat kidnap hui aur kidnap kar

1 aurat kidnap hui aur kidnap karne walon ne uske pati ko phone kiya: "Agar aaj raat tak raQam na di toh tumhari biwi ka murder kar denge"


Pati khamosh raha.


Agle din phir phone aya "Agar aaj raat tak raqam na di toh tumhari biwi ko wapas chhod jayenge!"


Pati: "Paise bol paise kaminey, darata kyu hai ?". 😜💸🔨🔨🔨😡

Lovely sms : OneDay..Death came to a Guy and said

OneDay..Death came to a Guy and said:

"Hey, today is your last day!"

Guy: "But i'm not ready!".

Death said: "Well today your name is the first on my list...".

Guy:"Okay,then why don't you take a seat and We will drink a COFFEE before we go?"

Death:"All right.. ".

The Guy gave Death some COFFEE with sleeping pills in it.
Death finished COFFEE and fell into a deep sleep!!!

The Guy took the list & removed his name from top of the list and put at the bottom of the list!

When Death woke up he said to the Guy:"Because you have been so nice to me, now I will start my job from the BOTTOM of the list.." !!! Moral:

Whatever is written in your Destiny ...
Will never change... no matter how much u try....
So Shri Krishna Says:

"Tu karta woh hai
Jo tu chahata hai,

Par hota woh hai
jo mai chahata hu !

Tu kar woh jo mai Chahata hu ....
Fir hoga woh jo tu chahta hai....Jsk
..^..
,(-_-),
'\'''''.\'='-.
\/..\\,'
//"")
(\ /n
\ |,
,,; ',
It's such awsum MSG so I posted.....do read It again.....👍

Informative sms: ईश्वर का दिया कभी अल्प नहीं होता; जो टूट जाये वो संकल्प नहीं होता;

🌾🌾🌾ईश्वर का दिया कभी अल्प नहीं होता;
जो टूट जाये वो संकल्प नहीं होता;
हार को लक्ष्य से दूर ही रखना;
क्योंकि जीत का कोई विकल्प नहीं होता।🌿🌿🌿


🌾🌾🌾जिंदगी में दो चीज़ें हमेशा टूटने के लिए ही होती हैं:
"सांस और साथ"
सांस टूटने से तो इंसान 1 ही बार मरता है;
पर किसी का साथ टूटने से इंसान पल-पल मरता है।🌿🌿🌿


🌾🌾🌾जीवन का सबसे बड़ा अपराध - किसी की आँख में आंसू आपकी वजह से होना।
और
जीवन की सबसे बड़ी उपलब्धि - किसी की आँख में आंसू आपके लिए होना।🌿🌿🌿


🌾🌾🌾जिंदगी जीना आसान नहीं होता;
बिना संघर्ष कोई महान नहीं होता;
जब तक न पड़े हथोड़े की चोट;
पत्थर भी भगवान नहीं होता।
🌿🌿🌿

🌾🌾🌾जरुरत के मुताबिक जिंदगी जिओ - ख्वाहिशों के मुताबिक नहीं।
क्योंकि जरुरत तो फकीरों की भी पूरी हो जाती है;
और ख्वाहिशें बादशाहों की भी अधूरी रह जाती है। 🌿🌿🌿


🌾🌾🌾मनुष्य सुबह से शाम तक काम करके उतना नहीं थकता;
जितना क्रोध और चिंता से एक क्षण में थक जाता है।🌿🌿🌿


🌾🌾🌾दुनिया में कोई भी चीज़ अपने आपके लिए नहीं बनी है।
जैसे:
दरिया - खुद अपना पानी नहीं पीता।
पेड़ - खुद अपना फल नहीं खाते।
फूल - अपनी खुशबु अपने लिए नहीं बिखेरते।
मालूम है क्यों?
क्योंकि दूसरों के लिए ही जीना ही असली जिंदगी है।🌿🌿🌿


🌾🌾🌾मांगो तो अपने रब से मांगो;
जो दे तो रहमत और न दे तो किस्मत;
लेकिन दुनिया से हरगिज़ मत माँगना;
क्योंकि दे तो एहसान और न दे तो शर्मिंदगी।🌿🌿🌿


🌾🌾🌾कभी भी 'कामयाबी' को दिमाग और 'नकामी' को दिल में जगह नहीं देनी चाहिए।
क्योंकि, कामयाबी दिमाग में घमंड और नकामी दिल में मायूसी पैदा करती है।🌿🌿🌿


🌾🌾🌾कौन देता है उम्र भर का सहारा। लोग तो जनाज़े में भी कंधे बदलते रहते हैं।🌿🌿🌿


🌾🌾🌾कोई व्यक्ति कितना ही महान क्यों न हो, आंखे मूंदकर उसके पीछे न चलिए।
यदि ईश्वर की ऐसी ही मंशा होती तो वह हर प्राणी को आंख, नाक, कान, मुंह, मस्तिष्क आदि क्यों देता?🌿🌿🌿

Husband wife sms: THE SECRET TO A HAPPY MARRIED LIFE-

THE SECRET TO A HAPPY MARRIED LIFE-
Once I asked my friend, "What is the secret behind your Happy Married Life?"

He said "You should share responsibilities with due love and respect each other. Then absolutely there will be no problems."

I asked "Can you explain?"

He said "In my house, I take decisions on bigger issues where as my Wife decides on smaller issues. We do not interfere in each other's decisions."

Still not convinced, i asked him "Give me some examples".

He said "Smaller issues like,
which car we should buy,
how much amount to save,
when to visit the super market, when & where to go on vacation,
which sofa, air conditioner, refrigerator to buy.
Monthly expenses, whether to keep a maid or not etc. Are all decided by my wife. I just agree to it "

I asked "Then, what is your role?"

He said "My decisions are only for very big issues. Like whether America should attack Iran, whether Britain should lift sanctions over Zimbabwe, whether to widen the Sri Lankan economy, whether Sachin Tendulkar should retire from Cricket , Whom should Salman Khan Marry. etc etc. and do you know, my wife, NEVER, objects to any of these decisions".👍👍
😜😜😜
👏👏👏👏

Pj joke:Tinku 1 lecture attend karta hai.

Tinku 1 lecture attend karta hai.

Lecture k baad usey bhook lagti hai, So he goes 2 d canteen.

Canteen me tinku 1 pav leta hai. Jaise hi wo paav khane k liye uthata he to dekhta h k uski plate me JANNAT likha hai.

To ab aapko ye batana h k tinku k profesor ka naam kya hai ?

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.
Ans-ISHQ KI CHHAON

kyuki

.
.
.
.
Jinke SIR ho ISHQ KI CHHAON

'PAV' k niche 'JANNAT' hogiiiiii...
Chal chayian chaiyan chaiyan chayian

💃 🏃.
🚂🚎🚎🚎🚎💨💨


Disastrous tha na....!

Maine bhi jhela ! Y shd I suffer alone!😜😁😂

Husband wife sms: After 15 years of marriage, a wife

After 15 years of marriage, a wife asked her husband to describe her. He looked at her slowly and without blinking an eye, said: ABCDEFGHIJK.
"What does that mean?" she asked.
"Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Fashionable, Gorgeous and Hot" he replied.
Smiling, she asked: What about IJK?
He replied: I'm Just Kidding!
😜😛😍😄

College sms: DEFINITION of "bachpan"::: ----------

DEFINITION of "bachpan"::: ------------------Once choosing the colour of a sketch pen was a tough task.
🔴🔵🔶🔷🎨🎨🎨🎨🎨🎨

Occupying the window seat in the school bus was called obsession.🚌🚎🚌🚎🚌🚎🚌🚎🚌🚎

Getting a toffee as a birthday treat from a friend made our day.
🍬🍫🍭🍬🍫🍭🍬🍫🍭🍭

Being the first one to finish copying from the blackboard was the ultimate moment of pride.
📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝

Hiding the answers
📄📃📑📝📋📋📋📋📋📋
from a bench partner during exams was not called selfishness.

When homework 📖📕📗📘📙📓📔📖📕📗
was the only torture & finished it soon,
so could get some extra time to play.🎮🏀🏈⚾⚽🎾🎱🏉🎯🎳

Early to bed
🙇🌙🙇🌙🙇🌙🌌🌙🌌🌙,
early to rise
☀🌞🌝☀🌝☀🌝☀🌙🌝
was life's mantra, but how we loved sleeping late and having some extra TV time!
💻📺🎮📻💻📺🎮📻💻📺

Owning a cycle was owning BMW
🚲🚵🚴🚲🚵🚴🚲🚵🚴🚲

To look good was only to wear our fav dress frocks for girls n half pants for boys.
👗👖👗👖👗👖👗👗👖👖

We didn't need FB or a phone to keep in touch!
👭👬👯👭👭👬👯👬👭👭

We thought all elders are ideal, when Daddy was the only hero
👴
and Mom was the only Best friend."👪

So what they say is right.
"Everybody dies twice. Once when their childhood ends."
🙇🙇👭👭👬👬👬👭🙇🙇

Got this awesome msg that made my day
👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌
Hope u all like it too..:)
👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍 send ths to all your frndzz...... Nd make realise thm tht u haven't forgotten ur childhood. 😊☺👫👬👫👬👫

Husband wife sms: A mechanical engineer went to police station for

A mechanical engineer went to police station for
filing report for his missing wife:

Engineer : I lost my wife, she went for shopping and still not reached home yet

Inspector: What is her height

Engineer: I never noticed

Inspector: Slim or healthy

Engineer: Not slim can be healthy

Inspector: Colour of eyes

Engineer: Never noticed

Inspector: Colour of hair

Engineer: Changes according to
season

Inspector: What was she wearing

Engineer: Saree/suit/ I don't
remember exactly

Inspector: Was she going in a car ?????????

Engineer: yes

Inspector : tell me the number ,name and color of the car

Engineer: black audi A8 with supercharged 3.0 liter V6 engine generating 333 horse power teamed with an eight-
speed tiptronic automatic
transmission with manual mode.
And it has full LED
headlights, which use light
emitting diodes for all light
functions and has a very thin scratch on the front left door
…. And
theN the engineer started crying…..

Inspector: Lets search for the car first 😂😛

Husband wife sms: Aao Wife ki nazar se duniya ko dekhoo.

💝Aao Wife ki nazar se duniya ko dekhoo..
🔰World ka sab se perfect man
-uska daddy.
🔰World ki sabse pyari aurat
-uski maa
🔰World ki sabse akkalmand aurat
-woh khud
🔰World ka sabse dukhi pati
-uska bhai.
🔰World ki sabse badi chudeal
-uski bhabhi
🔰World ka sabse sundr ladka
-uska beta
🔰World ka sabse Nasibdar aadmi
-uski behan ka pati.
🔰World ki sabse badi gawar aurat
-uski saas
aur dunia ka sabse kharab,nikamma,selfish,jhootha,kanjus, bekar aadmi
✈-YE BHI LIKHNA PADEGA KYA?😜😜 😘

Political humor: OUR PRESENT GOVERNMENT'S MOTTO :Pakistan bhale

OUR PRESENT GOVERNMENT'S MOTTO :Pakistan bhale
hi delhi taak aa jaye...Modi nai ana chahiye....

Naughty sms: American boy: mom i am dark even

American boy: mom i am dark even though u r white, why? Mom: listen son, considering all mistakes n crazy things that i had done in my youth, forget about being dark, just thank God that u don't bark! 😜😜