Thursday, May 22, 2014

Political humor: arwind kejriwal ke drame

A fellow walked into a pet store and was looking a

A fellow walked into a pet store and was looking at the animals on display.

While he was there, a Chief Master Sergeant from the local Air Force Base walked in and said to the shop-keeper :"I'd like a line service monkey, please."


The clerk nodded, went to a cage at the side of the store and took out a monkey. He put a collar and leash on the animal and handed it to the Chief, "That'll be $1,000." The Chief paid and left with the monkey.

Surprised, the fellow went to the shopkeeper and said, "That was a very expensive monkey. Most of them are only a few hundred dollars. Why did that one cost so much?"

The shopkeeper answered, "Ah-----that was a line service monkey. He can park, fuel, and service all Air Force aircraft, conduct all required ground ops testing, rig aircraft flight controls, and all with no mistakes. He's well worth the money."

With his interest peaked, the fellow looked around and spotted a Monkey in another cage with a $10,000 price tag. "That one's even more expensive! What can it do?"

"Oh, that one is a "Maintenance Supervisor" monkey. He can instruct at all levels of aircraft maintenance, supervise all corrective and preventive maintenance programs, supervise a crew of maintainers, and even do most of the paperwork. A very useful monkey indeed," replied the shopkeeper.

The guy looked around a little longer and found a third monkey in a cage. The price tag read, "$50,000". "Holy Shit! What does this one do?"

"Well," the shopkeeper said, "I've never actually seen him do anything but drink beer, fart, screw the female monkeys, and play with his pecker, but his papers say he's a pilot!!!"

One afternoon a wealthy manager was driving in his

One afternoon a wealthy manager was driving in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed by the sight, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate. He asked one man "Why are you eating grass?"

"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We have to eat grass." "Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you" the manager said.

"But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there, under that tree".

"Bring them along," the manager replied. Turning to the other poor man he stated, "You come with us also."

The second man, in a pitiful voice then said, "But sir, I also have a wife and six children with me!"

"Bring them all, as well," the manager answered.
They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limousine was.

Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to mr. Manager and said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you.

The manager replied, "Glad to do it. You'll really love my place; the grass is almost 1 meter high!"

Lesson: Never trust managers....and there is nothing like KIND MANAGERS
ЁЯШДЁЯШАЁЯШГЁЯШЫЁЯШнЁЯШВ

рдПрдХ рдХрд░реНрдордЪрд╛рд░реАрдХреЛ рдЙрд╕рдХреА рдХрдореНрдкрдиреА рдХреЗ рддрд░рдлрд╕реЗ 'рд╕рд╛рдпрдХрд▓' рдорд┐рд▓реА..

рдПрдХ рдХрд░реНрдордЪрд╛рд░реАрдХреЛ рдЙрд╕рдХреА рдХрдореНрдкрдиреА рдХреЗ рддрд░рдлрд╕реЗ 'рд╕рд╛рдпрдХрд▓' рдорд┐рд▓реА..

рд╡реЛ рдПрдХ рдЦреБрдмрд╕реБрд░рдд рддреЛрд╣рдлрд╛ рдерд╛.. рдордЧрд░ рдЙрд╕реЗ рдкрд┐рдЫреЗ Carrier рдирд╣реА рдерд╛..!
рдХрд░реНрдордЪрд╛рд░реАрдиреЗ рдЙрд╕реЗ рд▓рдЧрд╛рдиреЗ рдХреА рдорд╛рдВрдЧ рдХрд░реА..
рдЬрдм рд╕рд╛рдпрдХрд▓ Carrier рдлрд┐рдЯреАрдВрдЧ рдХрд░рдХреЗ рдЖрдпреА рддреЛ рдЙрд╕рдиреЗ рджреЗрдЦрд╛ рдХреА рдЕрдм рд╕рд╛рдпрдХрд▓ рдХрд╛ Stand рдирд┐рдХрд╛рд▓ рджрд┐рдпрд╛ рдЧрдпрд╛ рдерд╛..!

рдЙрд╕рдиреЗ рдЧрд╛рдпрдм рд╣реБрдП Stand рдХреЗ рдмрд╛рд░реЗ рдореЗ рдкреБрдЫрд╛.. рддреЛ рдХрдореНрдкрдиреАрд╕реЗ рдЬрд╡рд╛рдм рдЖрдпрд╛ :
рдкреНрд░рд╛рдпрд╡реЗрдЯрдореЗ рдиреМрдХрд░реА рдХрд░ рд░рд╣реЗ рд╣реЛ рддреЛ рдПрдХ рд╣реА рдЪрд┐рдЭ рдкреЛрд╕рд┐рдмрд▓ рд╣реИ..

CAREER рдпрд╛ STAND

рдЕрдЧрд░ STAND рд▓реЛрдЧреЗ рддреЛ CAREER рдЦрддрдо...
рдФрд░ рдЕрдЧрд░ CAREER рдмрдирд╛рдирд╛ рд╣реИ рддреЛ рдХрднреА STAND рдордд рд▓реЗрдирд╛..!

рд╕рднреА Private job рд╡рд╛рд▓реЛ рдХреЛ рд╕рдорд░реНрдкрд┐рдд...!!

I respect Kejriwal for fulfilling his promise that

I respect Kejriwal for fulfilling his promise that he will send the ex-Delhi CM to jail...ЁЯШЭЁЯШЭЁЯШЭ

ЁЯШЭЁЯШЭ"рджрд░рдЕрд╕рд▓ рдХреЗрдЬрд░реАрд╡рд╛рд▓ рдХрд╣рддреЗ рд░рд╣ рдЧрдП рдХрд┐ рд╡реЛ рдЦрд╛рдВрд╕реА рд╕реЗ

ЁЯШЭЁЯШЭ"рджрд░рдЕрд╕рд▓ рдХреЗрдЬрд░реАрд╡рд╛рд▓ рдХрд╣рддреЗ рд░рд╣ рдЧрдП рдХрд┐ рд╡реЛ рдЦрд╛рдВрд╕реА рд╕реЗ
рд▓реЬрдирд╛ рдЪрд╛рд╣рддреЗ рд╣реИрдВ рдкрд░ рдЙрдирдХреА рдкрд╛рд░реНрдЯреА
рдиреЗ реЪрд▓рддрдлрд╣рдореА,рдЬреЛрд╢ рдФрд░
рдЬрд▓реНрджрдмрд╛реЫреА рдореЗрдВ рдЙрдиреНрд╣реЗрдВ рдХрд╛рд╢реА рд╕реЗ рд▓реЬрд╛ рджрд┐рдпрд╛ "ЁЯШЭЁЯШЭ

Monday, May 19, 2014

Urban Dictionary has added a new word: 'Congressed

Urban Dictionary has added a new word: 'Congressed' (verb, adj). It means getting fully, totally, irredeemably screwed.
Eg - I got "Congressed" at Work Today ЁЯШЬЁЯШЬ

рдЕрдВрдбреЗ рдХрд╛ рдЪрд┐рд▓реНрд▓рд╛ (Fluffy egg omelette chilla )

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