Husband wife sms: husband wife series :d

💙 WHO'S GUILTY !
Husband and wife are 💙 WHO'S GUILTY !
Husband and wife are sleeping..
Wife dreaming... and she suddenly shouts "Quick, my husband is back"... Husband gets up in lightning speed & jumps out of the window.


💙 Total Disaster !
Two friends were walking but suddenly they stopped.
1St : Oh my god !! my girl friend & my wife r coming together...!!!
2nd : Damn Mine too...!!


💙 Banner In Front Of a corporate office:
"Drive Slowly, Don't Kill The Employees. Leave Them To Us.. We Do It In A Legal Way
Regards,
HR

💙 Sardar sir k sath sath kandho par bhi
shampu laga rha tha.
Wife - kandho pe shampu kyo laga rahe ho?
Sardar - Pagli ye koi aam shampu nahi hai
ye Head.. &.. Shoulder hai..

💙 Wife- U luv me. Hubby- Of course i do. Wife- Toh aap meri parvah kyun nahi karte. Hubby- Pagli pyaar karne wale kissi ki parvah nahi karte

💙 Santa ki tapasya se khush ho kar Bhagwan bole-
'VAR MANGO VATS'.
Santa Prabhu !! Jaisa aap soch rahe ho me waisa nahi hu...
'MUJHE VADHU CHAHIYE'

💙 Husband & Wife dono market gaye to Ek Ladki ne HELLO kiya..
Wife:"kaun thi wo ??
Husband:"Tum plz dimag kharab mat karo,.. . abhi usko bhi batana hai ki tum kaun ho..!!

Husband wife sms: The Guy's Rules:

The Guy's Rules:
(We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side). These are just rules! Please note.. these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!


1. Men ARE not mind readers

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmailing

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your saheli are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 5 Days..

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted in two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one .

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible , Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see only 7 colors.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football, cars, bikes or games

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. U r in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really dont mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh😝😉

Reply sms: Guess what is written in this picture

Political humor: ब्लैकमेल करने की हद तो देखें...

ब्लैकमेल करने की हद तो देखें...

एक भिखारी एक बोर्ड पकड़ कर बैठा था, जिस पर लिखा था-
'मुझे पैसे दान करें, नहीं तो मैं कांग्रेस को वोट कर फिर जिता दूंगा और फिर आपको भी मेरे साथ यहां बैठकर भीख मांगनी पड़ेगी। सोच लें, फैसला आपके हाथ में है!

Political humor: USD = UNITED STATES DOLL

USD = UNITED STATES DOLLAR
EUR = EURO
GBP = GREAT BRITAIN POUND
INR = IZZAT NAHI RAHI....

Option pe option

This one is mind boggling...😉😉
Option pe option😆😆

2 sikh soldiers capture a pakistani,
gave him a dice🎲 & said:
If u get 1,2,3,4,5,We'll kill u.
Pakistani askd:
Aur agar 6 aya to?
Sikh Fauji:
'LUDO' nahi khela kya? Phir se chance milega...😜😜😜6⃣🔄

Pappu n papa: Papa: whom do u like more...mama or papa??

Papa: whom do u like more...mama or papa??
Pappu: both
Papa: no..tell me one name..
Pappu: both
Papa: OK..if I go to America n ur mom goes to Paris....where will u go??
Pappu: Paris
Papa: DAT means u like ur mom more
Pappu: no..its bcoz Paris is more beautiful Dan America.
Papa: OK...if I go to Paris n ur mom to America.. Dan where u will go??
Pappu: America
Papa: y?
Pappu: Paris to ghoom aaye na papa..😜😃

Long sms: Mere adhoore sapne...

_Mere adhoore sapne...👥💭💭💭

_Jab bachapan tha toh jawani dream tha…

_ jab jawan hue toh bachpan desire hain ….

_ Jab ghar mein rehte they azadi achi lagti thi…

_Aaj akele hain toh har pal ghar ke din yaad aate hain..…

_Kabhi hotel mein jana… pizza, burger khana…. Pasand hoti thi..…

_Aaj ghar par aana aur maa ke hath ke khane mein hi janaat hain....

_Jinse jhagadte they school mein un dosto ko internet mein talashte hain..…

_Aaj kal toh khush rehne ke tarike bhi hum google mein search marte hain….

_Facebook se dating…. Aur flipkart, ebay se shopping karte hain …

_Ghar par bhi baat ab whatsapp/gtalk se karte hain…

_Life ko laptop aur mobile mein samet dia hain….

_Hum shamjate hain humne khud ko update kia hain….

_Iss nai dunia mein humne kya guma dia….

_Kab kya badla hume kuch na pata chala..

_Paisa mila naam mila… kuch hain hum mein bhi yeh vishwas mila…

_Par kya choda… kya tyaga humne… iska na hisab mila….

_Khushi kisme hoti hain… yeh pata ab chala hain…..

_Bachapan kya tha iska ehsaas ab hua hain..

_Kash badal sakta mein zindgai ke kuch saal pichale….

_Kash jee sakta mein zindagi ek baar fir se…

_Kash mil sakta bachpan mujhko ek baar firse…🙇🙇

Funny sms:Kapil sharma making fun of salman

Salman: Main Revital kareeb 15 saal se kha
raha hoon

Kapil Sharma : SHAADI HO NAHI RAHI.
KATRINA KO RANBEER LE GAYA, AISHWARYA KO ABHISHEK LE GAYA..
REVITAL KHA KAR KYA MILA?
BABAJI KA THULLU 😂😂

Husband wife sms: Maruti Zen ki nilaami ho rahi thi.

Maruti Zen ki nilaami ho rahi thi...
.
.
Boli lagi.
.
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15 lakh.
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20 lakh.
.
.
.
40 lakh
Husband: Is khataare Gadi me aisa kya hai?
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Seller: Iske 23 accident hue hai, har bar sirf
biwi
mari hai.
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Husband: Iski maa ka sakinaka. . 1 crore

Husband wife sms: Maruti Zen ki nilaami ho rahi thi.

Maruti Zen ki nilaami ho rahi thi...
.
.
Boli lagi.
.
.
15 lakh.
.
.
20 lakh.
.
.
.
40 lakh
Husband: Is khataare Gadi me aisa kya hai?
.
.
.
.
Seller: Iske 23 accident hue hai, har bar sirf
biwi
mari hai.
.
.
.
.
.
Husband: Iski maa ka sakinaka. . 1 crore