Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Naughty sms: Managing Director during inspection

Managing Director during inspection to office visit asks a Manager "yes smarty. What do you do?"

Manager (calmly): "Sir, I'm the Sexual Advisor to the VP"

Pin drop silence ensues, photographer stopped taking pictures, all others stopped working and started looking around . The MD looks with glaring eyes at the VP...

VP (cursing the Manager), speaks with the pent up energy "explain your last remark Manager" .

Manager (looking at MD): "Actually sir, whenever I say something, the VP says - WHEN I NEED YOUR 'FUCKING ADVICE', I'LL ASK FOR IT"

Funny pj: there was a couple who had

There was a couple who had thier relationship since 5 years.

They loved eacvh other a lot. The girl was beautiful and the boy was faithful.

One day, the girl came to the boy and showed her new pink eye lenses.

Withing a moment the boy fainted and fell on the floor.

The girl rushed him to the hospital. Special team of doctors started operating the boy. After waiting for 37 hours, the girl met the doctor. The doctor said,

"We have found alcohol in your friend's heart."

The girl got shocked and said, "But he never ever had a drink in his life, how can this be possible?"

Doctor, "Even we are going to research on it. You go to your home now, you can visit him tomorrow."

The girl hired a taxi and started thinking about the incident. Then suddenly she heard the song playing in the taxi:

Gulabi aanken jo teri dekhi,
Sharabi yeh dil ho gaya.

Kya hai na whatsapp free hai, toh logo ko kuch bhi bhejo bohot interest se padhte hai ๐Ÿ˜„
Send it to your friends and unko bhi pareshan karo
enjoyyyyy๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„

Husband wife sms: Divided by ego, United by gossips!

"Divided by ego,
United by gossips!"
-Women

"Divided by women,
United by Liquor!"
- Men
Cheers ๐Ÿท

Gujju joke: Hansa: praful tournament matlab??

✅ Hansa: praful
tournament matlab??

Praful: tournament hansaaaa yeh jo tumne kaanme jhumke pehne hai use tournament kehte hai...

Bapuji: abey praful gadhe use ornaments kehte hai.๐Ÿ‘บ

Praful: bapuji ohh bapuji ek kaan me pehno to ornaments or dono kaan me pehno to two ornaments matlab tournament....๐Ÿ˜

Hansa: haay haay bapuji ko to kuch bhi nahi aata...๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ”ซ⚡๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ™ ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‰☺๐Ÿ˜Š.

Gujju joke: hansa : prafool

Hansa: Prafoool, ye Senior or Junior ka kya matlab?
Praful: Hansaaaaaa samundra k najdik rehte hai wo (sea+near)
= Senior
&
Jo Zoo k najdik rehte hai wo (Zoo+near) = Junior ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜ท๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜Ž
Hansa n Praful r back!!

Monday, October 21, 2013

Bollywood humor: It can happen only in Indian Movies

This one is awesome..
It can happen only in Indian Movies

Baghban:Amitabh Bachchan and Hema Malini are separated right after Holi remember Amitabh singing Holi khele Raghubeera?). They are said to be separated for six months, ie from March to September. Within that six-month period, they celebrate Valentine's Day, which falls on February 14, and karva chauth, which is usually observed in October. There is no way these two occasions could come between March and September!

u all may know that.............

Now for cricket fans..........to enhance their movie cricket rules........

Lagaan: Lagaan was shot in the late 19th century. At the time, an over in cricket used to consist of 8 balls. But in this movie, an over has 6 balls. Maybe modern cricket learnt from the movie.

Amar Akbar Anthony :Three men donate blood at the same time to the same person.

It can happen because that scene was very emotional...........???????

Pyar To Hona Hi Tha:Kajol gets off the train to use the public toilet at the railway station and the train chugs off without her. Poor girl,little did she know that every train compartment has four toilets inside.

No comment ...............Indian movies???????

Khiladiyon Ka Khiladi: Akshay Kumar boards a Jet Airways flight to America ?????? Well,! well, some promotion for our Indian Jet Airways.................

International Khiladi + Domestic Flight = International Flight + Khiladiyon ka khiladi

ra one : when sharukh khan dies, being a south indian he was given a christian funeral but later we see kareena kapoor uske asthiyo ko paani me baha deti hai, this was a big mistake no one noticed..

In Krish , Priety got pregnant when Hrithik was not with her in 2 years.

dhoom 2. . abhishek bachan jumps off the cliff. . straight on the shoulders of hrithik on a parachute .""

N last one is an epic "Sholay" where (now) jaya bachchan lights a lantern in the beginning as there is no electricity in the village..andDharmendra is on a water tank to commit suicide.

Paani ki tanki me bina electriicity ke paani upar kya Thakur chadhata tha?????? ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜

Flirty sms: Dear Love Guru

Dear Love Guru,

There is this girl I love so much but I still don't know why she won't talk to me anymore. It started like this:

She posted on Facebook: "All men are dogs!"

I commented: "Which breed is your father?"

That's how the problem started. Please did I ask the wrong question?

Sincerely confused.

Motivational sms: A psychology professor

A psychology professor asked his students just one question for their final exams:

How are you going to make me believe that the chair in front of you is invisible?

It took all students an hour to finish the answer, excpt a lazy student who took only 5 seconds.

Eventually, the lazy student got the highest score. His answer was:

"WHICH CHAIR???"

life is simple. Keep it simple...๐Ÿ˜Š

Funny sms: Joke of the month

๐Ÿ˜ธ
Joke of the month๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜

Sir - kaunsa panchhi sabse tez udta hai?
Boy - sir ... haathi
Sir - nalayak! Tera baap kya karta hai?
Boy - chhota rajan ke gang mey shooter hai.
Sir - shabash! !! Bachho likho Haathi..

Sahi jawab..๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ˜‚

Friday, October 18, 2013

Flirty sms: Ladka apne dost se: tune us ladki ko propose kyu kiya uska

Ladka apne dost se:
tune us ladki ko propose kyu kiya uska
to b.f. Hai......??????
.
Zakkas reply:.
.
.
.
.
.
.
...
.
.
.
.
.
.
Khali Kursi Pe to koi Bhi Beth saktaHai,
Dum hai to kisi ko Utha ke Betho..=))

Motivational sms: Ek Bacha Ice-Cream Shop Pe Gaya

Ek Bacha Ice-Cream Shop Pe Gaya or
Pucha K
Bada Cup Kitny Ka Hai?
Waiter Ne jawab Diya Rs. 15 ka.
... Bachay Ne Apne Paisy Ginay
Or Pucha:
Chota Cup Kitny Ka Hai?
Waiter: Rs. 12 ka.
Bachy Ne Chota Cup Kharida
Or 12 Rupy De Kr
Chala Gaya.
Jab Waiter Uski Table Se
Khali Cup Uthany Aaya To
Ye Dekh Kar
Uski Ankhen Num Hogai K Bachy Ne 3
Rupy Tip Us Waiter K Liye Chor Diye
The.
LESSON: Apni Choti Khushi bhool Kr
K Aap
Dusron Ko Badi Khushi De Sakte
Hain.
I Think it's a Nice Msg
SHARE if you Like it too ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ‘

เค…ंเคกे เค•ा เคšिเคฒ्เคฒा (Fluffy egg omelette chilla )

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